Dear momma, RELEASE the Guilt.
Something I have been thinking through lately with The Mother's Nest...
is our HEART.
It is VERY easy to get caught up in the way our society does things,
The fast-never ending pace of social media,
The keeping up with the modern day leaders and organizations.
And sometimes. I just have to remember to come back to the heart.
I chuckle to myself sometimes when I meet with older mothers who just plain old forget how tough the younger years in the trenches were for them, or maybe they have amnesia (can i get some of that?)
I cry with the ones who remember.
I explain to the ones who just don't quite get why ALL mothers need support.
And I expand on our vision over and over again.
But when it all comes down to it.
The Heart is what matters.
This organization started because of the need in our society for a realness among mothers.
For the acceptance to go beyond the boundaries of specific parenting and feeding choices, and truly just acceptance as we are all in the same stage of life, and we are all worthy of support.
The need to lift one another up, step in to each other's struggles, instead of give our "expert" advice, and walk away leaving bruises, and battles in others hearts.
Last night I sat with a group of women in our Becoming Mom program.. as we all talked about feeding, everything from breastfeeding, formula feeding, allergies and feeding, food aversions... etc.
The Modern day idea of feeding.
The pressure to do things a certain way.
The guilt when you choose another path.
Or when that other path chooses you.
And my heart is broken.
My heart is broken for our society.
The fact that we care more about if a mother is breastfeeding her child or giving it a pacifier, and less about the fact that they are giving life to a human being. One that will roam this earth as an adult one day. One that will develop from the ideals, the mothering that these mothers will give to these children.
My heart is broken for the moms in our society.
The fact that many have had to leave face book chat groups because of the sheer attack they have received when asking a genuine question in the midst of their brokenness, and sheer anxiety trying to figure their child out.
My heart is broken for the know it alls in our society.
The ones that seem to know every single answer to every single issue. The ones who find their identity by the type of mom that they are. The ones who judge others for not being the way that they are. The sheer fact that their identity has become wrapped in the type of parenting they do... and not the fact that they are a parent, a child of God.. and that is simply enough.
My heart is broken for our world.
In a day and age where there is literally a google page for every single question possible... we live in a state of fear and anxiety that we aren't doing it right. That our instincts as mothers aren't good enough.. that our children aren't capable of leading us with their cues and specific personalities. Or that the decisions we make for our family have to be influenced by what society sees as healthy and acceptable for a certain class of mom.
and to be honest. Sometimes I am just down right angry.
I am angry at some of the comments that are made about moms today.
I am angry that mothers feel SO much pressure about feeding that they end up spiraling into depression and overwhelmed with the guilt that consumes them.
When did this world become a place where google told you what was right or wrong for your family?
When facebook groups shunned mothers who do things differently?
When friendships were based only around the type of parenting you did?
And when moms started feeling guilty over literally everything.
In the grand scheme of things... what matters is that you didnt spend the time looking at everyone elses parenting choices and making them your own.... It matters that YOU MADE YOUR OWN PARENTING CHOICES.
You decided what was best for your family.
You decided what was best for your children, based on facts, environment, financial circumstances, etc.
You gave your child a stable home.
You accepted yourself, therefore showing your child to accept themselves.
I wonder sometimes.. what this generation of children will end up being like.
In an age where they saw their mothers constantly sectioning off themselves over parenting choices.
Finding their identity in styles of parenting.
I wonder what that does to a child in the long run.
A child who their mother doesn't trust their own voice.
A mother who doesn't stand firm in who she is.
A mother who tries to be everyone else.
A mother who feels guilt for loving the baby years.
Or for having an easy pregnancy and childbirth.
A mother who feels guilt for not breastfeeding because she worked.
A mother who lets that guilt consume her.
Today. I just want to speak the word RELEASE.
Release your idea of what you think a "good mom" is.
You are free.
You are free from the idea that one way is better than another.
You are free from the guilt.
NO ONE is holding that on you today... but yourself.
Release yourself to enjoy the parenting styles and choices you have made for your family.
Release yourself to be comfortable in your own skin...
whether thats breastfeeding in public, or breaking out the formula bottle to feed your child.
Be FREE to know that you are accepted here at The Mother's Nest.
And the main thing we are concerned with is that you are comfortable with YOU.
that you have support.