The Potter And The Clay:
"The word that came to Jeremiah from the Lord: "Arise and go down to the potter's house, and there I will let you hear my words." So I went down to the potter's house, and there he was working with his wheel. And the vessel he was making of clay was spoiled in the potter's hand, and he worked it into another vessel, as it seemed good to the potter to do." Jeremiah 18
As I read this chapter in the Bible this morning, I myself felt as if I was Jeremiah... taking that walk down the hill to the potter's house. Seeing the clay in his hands. Messed up.. and being re-worked on the potter's wheel.
No, not just motherhood.
So. freaking. messy.
So many unmet expectations.
So many hurts and sufferings.
So many joys that overwhelm our hearts to explosion.
So. not. what. we. expected.
One thing I tell many new moms, especially pregnant moms.. is that motherhood is Messy. It is NEVER going to fit into the box that you think that it will..
because it was just not designed that way.
After all, the Bearing of children.. was our curse in the beginning of time. The most beautiful, awe inspiring, burdening, special, amazingly hard... curse
Often times I remember one of my favorite women in the world speaking into my life when I was pregnant. She said to me, "Through birthing and raising my children, I have learned so much about the fall of man, and of our salvation."
And can I tell you, that has stuck with me in my MANY "broken vessel" moments.
The moments where I am a hot mess.
Moments my husband has to sit me down and remind me how ugly things just got.
or moments like last week when I apologized to Hylan in the car for yelling at him VERY loudly for throwing his bear in the dog water bowl, for the 100th time that week.
I am reminded.
That I am that vessel.
A vessel is a piece of clay. Set on a wheel for our creator to mold us into something. Hoping that he will mold us into something beautiful, but there are no guarantees. There will be "spoiled" moments for us. Moments of ugliness. Moments of sheer agony. Moments of pain. Moments of suffering. Moments of tears.
But they were and ARE never separate from being in the hands of our maker.
He doesn't throw us on the ground when the "shape" we were made to be.. doesnt quite pan out.
He doesn't start again with someone else.
He doesn't worry
He doesn't stress
He doesn't give up.
He continues working.
Working on our inmost being.
Molding us into the people, the women, the mothers, the wives that we are meant to be.
The ones he originally had in mind when he set our ugly hunk of clay selves onto the potter's wheel.
He continues working.
We are just vessels.
In the hands of our maker.
Very capable hands.
Very steady hands.
Very ABLE hands.
We are just VESSELS, in the hands of our maker.
Would you pray this prayer with me today?
Make in me a new heart. Remind me in my moments of pride that I AM still a spoiled vessel in so many areas. Remind me that you do not fret by my mistakes, you continue working on me. Thank you for choosing me to be your vessel. To love your children. TO love like you do. Create in me a new realization and perspective today.. that you are my maker. You are my former. You knitted ME together in my mother's womb, and I am no mistake.
Thank you for your grace. Thank you for your mercy. Thank you for continuing to work on me... inside and out. I am yours.